S* happens

There used to be a bumper sticker going around that said Sh*t Happens. You might remember Forest Gump while running across the USA “inspired” the phrase when he stepped is some dog poo, and said to a follower “it happens….”.  The saying is supposed to have an existential meaning, perhaps a shortcut to something more profound.  Personally after years of working too hard, and watching so many others doing and still doing the same - while missing the more important things in life I like to borrow from John Lennon and amend it to use the phrase “life happens”.

I have been doing some work and having some discussions on the nature of success and how it is achieved. During my work on Emotional Intelligence I came across references in Daniel Golemans works on the impact of Emotional Intelligence on success and was testing the theories on the its contribution to success - but wondering if he had taken into account the actual meaning of success to the individual. For example if to one individual success was a cottage, a boat and some fly-fishing would Emotional Intelligence help a person achieve that. I came to the conclusion that factors that helped self knowledge and the ability to work with others is bound to help one achieve almost anything one sees as a successful outcome.

However - discussions about the factors that create success have been very interesting in that it is the vision, or the greater purpose that creates the success not working towards the success itself.  I was very taken by a comment made by Cory Kahaney in a television interview about how she worried about money and success until she got into comedy because she loved it - and success came while she was focused on doing what she loved and doing it well. She felt it was ironic that as soon as she stopped looking for success - she got it.

There seems to be a common theme that aiming for success for its own sake is a mistake. I re-read a very well known book by Viktor Frankl called “Man’s Search for Meaning“. Viktor was a concentration camp inmate who as a Psychiatrist made a number of very telling observations which he wrote about after he was released. His observations and thinking  changed modern psychology and have had a huge impact on many in terms of the choices we make.  The edition of the book I just read had a foreword by the author in which he wrote:

“Don’t aim at success - the more you aim at it and make it a target the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness cannot be pursued it must ensue and it only does so as the unintended side effect of ones dedication to a cause greater than oneself ….. “

I find this fantastic. Its means to me that one should find a cause or a vision greater than one which delivers to you the “stuff” you desire - rather choose one that is above all that but matters to you. Follow that cause or that vision and success will ensue as a by product.

In other words …. ”success happens”.

Aidan Higgins

Enneagram Applied to Leadership.

I spent most of last week with Peter O’Hanrahan, the globally reknowned Enneagram Teacher that Margaret O’Rorke and I brought to Ireland to conduct an advanced work shop at the marvelous Emmaus Centre in Swords, North Dublin. It was real, intense and an altogether enlightening experience.

We spent the week revisiting the types at an advanced level and working the interview typing process - which was an experience. Its very interesting that one must ensure ones own perception of the world is clear before one can judge others. What Helen Palmer calls the veil of illusion must be cleared before one can make a clear and precise judgement of others perceptional filters.

In offline discussions with Peter, I had a chance to explore the business applications further and we discussed a number of issues. Peter had interesting insights in the Application of the Enneagram to leadership and in fact he is taking part in a symposium in the Enneagram Leaders Conference in the US in September 2008 with other thought leaders.

The benefits to leadership centre around:
Learning the powerful interpersonal communication breakthroughs from working at “a new level of awareness and non-judgemental receptivity”.
Making REAL connections with people
Using the three centres of intelligence (mind, body and heart) fully.
Exploring the next levels of your potential effectiveness by increase self acceptance and management of reactivity.
Understanding how to work with each of the other Enneagram styles.
Appreciating the special nature of each of the other perspectives.

As a Managing Director I have applied the Enneagram in leadership by understanding my own gifts and weak points better and working to resolve the latter. It also makes a huge difference to have your team and the rest of the organisation Enneagram aware so they work better together, on their own or with you as a leader or manager.

It is also important to understand that leadership is also about context, as in the environment in which you find yourself and your organisation. When that changes do you have the ability to change your style in response - are you aware of it and of the emotional barriers you may have to hurdle to do so? As we all know now the only constant these days is change - so more important than ever to be able to change yourself. And all real change happens from within.

Aidan Higgins

Leaders need to take norming into account.

I spoke with an Olympic athlete the other day, a very relaxed very enjoyable conversation with a very interesting woman. Amongst other things we discussed her qualifying for the Olympics. She had just returned from her training camp and had spent the last 4 years working towards qualification. While she had made the qualifying time she had narrowly missed being picked to represent her country at the Beijing Olympics. I had been watching her progress over the last few years and we had been in touch regularly. Her dedication and work ethic were something to admire and it took 4 years fully focused to get her to the point where she was eligible and her country was eligible to qualify. After all that, while outwardly she wore a grim smile I could tell she had yet to fully deal with the dissappointment.

She made some very interesting points which overlap with many of the truths for business and personal mastery.

The first was that as she was doing her races there might be 100 competitors in a race and she would often find herself in one of the the top ten positions in the home stretch. It was then, looking back at it now, that she could almost hear the “gold medals jingling on the necks of those behind her” and she would begin to think “I don’t belong here” and could feel the weight of this slowing her down and as she dropped back she would say to herself subconsciously ”this is what I deserve”.

The second was that she felt that the elite athletes in her sport were all pretty equal. She said that the technologies, processes, skills and preparation were all pretty much the same from athlete to athlete and team to team. The difference was in their heads. With all the other conditioning and work going on this was the piece that was most likely to differentiate first from thirthieth place.

The third point was in the team races where there were a number of races run over a single day and the winner won on points overall. She would find herself having great fun enjoying the competition and doing really well. Then, towards the back end of the day she would look at the score board and see that here team were in maybe fourth place and in a qualifying spot for the Olympics. Then the fun would go out of it as well as the success and she and her team would slip back under the pressure of trying to win.

We discussed “flow”, a term I use often and which was first introduced to me by a colleague and how when you are in the zone everything seems to work smoothly and achievement is easy. It is the mental strength to stay focused on the process and not the outcome (or the putt and not the leaderboard) that allows one to stay in flow.

As well as this is the norming behaviour we covered before which is the little voice which tells you whether you belong there, whether you deserve this and whther you can achieve the success you seek.

In business it is most important to realise that when all else is equal it is the mental edge that can make the difference, for teams, for leadership or for individuals. We are now reaching the stage where many businesses are equal interms of resources and process and where the only differences exists withing the heads of the employees - your human capital. As well as the ability to innovate, there is the knowledge but also the mental strength. What is being put in place to support this? What do our Leaders do? What is done to support Leaders?

Plenty for students of performance to chew on.

Aidan Higgins

The Real Winners

I was sent this in an email and I thought it was great. Its particularly relevant as people are now looking for more meaning in their lives, when we are entering the age of ”Conscious Capitalism“ and when the death nell has been sounded for the Gordon Geckos of this world.

This is attributed to Charles Schultz, the creator of the ‘Peanuts’ comic strip. Just read rather than answer the questions - the item makes a very strong point.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America pageant.
4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.
5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.
6. Name the last decade’s worth of World Series winners.

How did you do? The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are not second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.

Here’s another quiz. See how you do on this one:

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.
2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.
3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.
5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.

The people that have the biggest impact on our lives do not necessarily have a lot of credentials, have not always won a lot of awards, or been heralded by the rest of the world. The people that usually have the biggest impact on our lives are the everyday heroes that are present and take a meaningful and active role in our life.

Redefining the nature of success starts a whole new ball game. Shultz’s comments cast a doubt on what we rate as success. As beauty is in the eye of the beholder so success should be defined by the individual in terms of whats important to them. Stephen Covey in his Seven Secrets book has a nice method of defining this for yourself based on what you value personally. 

So whats your definition of success?
And is it really your definition?

Aidan Higgins 

The start of Awareness

I was speaking the other day with a friend of mine about life’s difficulties and how people come away from bad experiences feeling lucky. It is more than once that I have heard this and it seems to be a common theme amongst those who have recovered from a difficult time. My friend had been through a very difficult time with a serious condition that did at one stage threaten her life but its biggest impact was the period of 5-6 years she had to live with it and the changes in imposed on her and the huge impact it had on her confidence.

She told me it was wonderful to have this new persepective on things but she wished she didn’t have to go through what she went through to get it. If only, she said, “there was a pill you could take instead of having to go through all that s***”. It re-set her priorities she said, a real paradigm shift in her view on life.

Another friend of mine went through an awful bereavement and used the exact same terms without prompting. “Lucky” . Having gone through hell and emerged again in the sunlight he is aware of all the positives and the priorities and getting right whats really important.

So what if there was a pill?  Would people take it without a gun to their head? Anthony de Mello claimed that people don’t like waking up, that awareness is rejected because when people are in their (comfort?) zone its like they are tucked up in a warm bed and they resist being woken up.

Often people are in a dream state and go through life focused on the wrong things, only becoming aware of this at the end of their lives. What if you could become aware when you could still get the huge benefits from this?

Steven Covey in his well read book “The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People” suggests to get your priorities straight you need to understand first what your values are. To do this he recommends you imagine your self attending your own funeral. Four people get up to share the eulogy each from a differet aspect of your life: Family, Work, Community and Spiritual. Write down what you would like them to say about you. That is what you value. That should be north on your compass.

A great exercise to do. Its not a pill but its a start.

Aidan Higgins

Putting the tin hat on it

Today is the 29th of February. And today provides me with an opportunity to review a certain perspective and attitute to employees and motivation by certain elements in this country.

I have been working on or with employee motivation and performance for years now and I advocate there is a correlation between employee performance and workplace happiness based on correct employee motivation. I hold also that certain sectors of Irish Employers still feel that treating staff well is a sign of weakness.

An interesting discussion with a HR manager the other day led to us disussing his experience that companies who are known to be good/best employers are doing so because being top of their game they can afford it. I tried to make the point that perhaps they were on top of their game because they were good to their employees? I also tried to explain the point that money is not the most important factor in employee motivation - the top three being appreciation, the ability to make a difference and getting help on personal problems.

I find there is a cynical approach to employment in certain sections of this country where an adversarial approach is insitigated and perpetuated and sometimes by special interest groups. I remember asking a question a few years back of Jim O Hara - one of the Leading lights in Intel in Ireland. I asked him “Do you think Irish companies get the Unions they deserve?”. He agreed they probably did. I also think Managements attitude often does contribute to many of the problems that occur. I think its a matter of truly caring for employees and showing it. I believe many have learned not to over years of adversarial management and the whole “us and them” philosophy.

I was talking to an employee of the HSE the other day who I asked to tell me one good thing about their employer. Not their job mind, their employer. After 5 minutes of embarrassing silence they he said “let me call you tomorrow on that”.

I have recently discussed with another public sector employee in a 365 service environment the situation of Rota preparation and the managers reluctance to actually give people the time off they request when it made no difference to cover overall. When he asked why he was told ” We can’t do that….they might get used to it”.

Now I have come across stories again and again like that and I believe that besides the adversarial approach to work management contributed to by both sides there is also a lack of real care about employees. Aside from the social aspects which this is not about - it makes good business sense to treat people well. A quote from a documentary shown on RTE made by a German Poet in the 1960s which was recently reshown comes to mind…. “The Irish love their children as long as they’re children”. Too strong? - perhaps - but this attitude has to change.

Its needs a Management initiative - and it will need trust and time. And it will need government support. Its not getting too much of that sort of attention. And now we are getting to the reason I am sounding off today on February 29th.

The Irish government have announced their understanding of a need to do something to recognise the need for work life balance for employees (and management too it must be fair) and so they have decided to announce a “work life balance day” where we consider this important aspect of well-being of Irish employees…….  and yes …….. they did indeed make it today - Feb 29th in a leap year.  Speaks volumes really.

Aidan Higgins

Mindset Matters

I am constantly amazed by the impact of a mindset. I see it in business. I see it in with my friends. I see it in rugby all the time.  Often success is a result of the view we have formed of ourselves and our norming behaviour ( behaviours that move our outcome up or down towards our expected outcome).

In business it’s seen in the can-do attitude of for example a Saleperson, in Rugby the reaparrance of a bogey team that we lose to again and in some friends their refusal to “go for it” feeling they are not good enough.

This is of course not a new idea. Henry Ford is famous for many things especially his production line processes that brought motoring to the masses in the US. One comment he made is well quoted - “whether you think you can or whether you think you can’t you are right”. 

A friend of mine Declan Coyle who gives courses which involve internal change often says to his class “If you think this is Pop Psychology - you will probably prove yourself right!”. 

I came across a very nice story recently told by Tony De Mello:

A man found an eagles egg and put it in the nest of a barnyard hen.
The eaglet hatched with the brood of chicks and grew up with them.
All his life the eagle did what the barnyard chicks did, thinking he was a barnyard chicken.
He scratched the earth for worms and insects.
He clucked and he cackled. And he would thrash his wings and fly a few feet up in the air.
Years passed and the Eagle grew very old.
One day he saw a magnificent bird above him in the cloudless sky.
It glided in graceful Majesty among the powerful wind currents with scarcely a beat of its golden wings.
The old eagle looked up in awe. “Who’s that?” he asked.
“Thats the eagle, the king of the birds,” said his neighbour.
“He belongs in the sky. We belong to the earth - we’re chickens”
So the eagle lived and died a chicken, for thats what he thought he was.

If we think about it we can see that this behaviour is entirely internal and therefore a choice. We may have been listening to those voices who point to our flaws and never our brilliance or who continue to tell us why we can’t do something they never will. These are the people Teddy Roosevelt called those that “dwell in perpetual twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat”.

Because its a mindset matter its internal and therefore under our own control. Positive thinking and a reset of our norm can bring great results. First however we need to wake up to its existence and to observe it in action. Once again awareness is critical. Its easier of course for those of us with confidence but its just a longer journey for those who don’t.

My mother always told me I could do anything. I believe her!

Aidan Higgins

Real Life Experience

I was thinking the other day of one of my little problems and getting all funked up about it. I stopped and using my tools of awareness I closed my eyes and breathed deeply into the problem and in a minute the anxiety was gone. I had a complete understanding of what was really causing the inner panic and the reactant anger.  While I was in my space a recent memory drifted into my mind and put everything in perspective.

The memory is a story a friend of mine told me about a time when he was living with and working with the poor in the Philipines. I remember when he told it to me I was stunned and I can still feel its emotional impact as I write this. My friend and I were discussing his time in the Philipines and his struggle to get food and education to the masses in poverty out there and the mindsets he had to change.

After we had a look at some records of what was going on out there he went looking for a document, a letter he had written at one time and we had difficulty locating it. He told me what the letter was for. It was a letter to the commander of the US Naval base asking if he could open the gates to the Naval Dump again so that the scavangers from the local populace could be re-admitted. The US Navy had closed the dump with good intentions on the grounds that it didn’t seem right that their dump should be attracting people to scavenge.

When they closed the dump the local villagers started to slowly starve, the dump providing a supplement to their meagre rations and it also became apparent that their salvaging income had dried up taking even more from their resources. So my friend organised a camppaign and wrote to the Naval base commander to explain the impact it was having and if he could see his way to opening the dump again. The Navy obliged and my friend recounts the joy and the celebrations that took place as a result.

In the cold light of day in that room where we were I thought about how tough things must have been when getting access to scavenge a dump was a victory worth celebrating. There was a quiet moment between us as I could see the memory etched on his face.

Stop and think about the story for a moment.

Looking at it from the outside one can see where our mindset can be blind because we see all from our own perspective. An greater awareness of the true situation would have stopped the dump from being closed. I imagine that the Commander of the base did not for one minute believe he could be doing the wrong thing. Perhaps it was beyond his comprehension that the results of his action would have such an outcome. Who could understand who has not been there that what they discard could be a source of life to others. That reality is still a reality. Perhaps I’ll think of that next time something trivial gets me upset.

Aidan Higgins

Social and Emotional Learning

It was Daniel Goleman that first brought my attention to Social and Emotional Learning.  This is a new field being explored in the US which uses the obvious corollary that if EQ is more important than IQ and it makes a huge impact on success in life then perhaps steps should be taken, in addition to the existing curriculum for children, to offer learning that develops EQ. One organisation that is working in this area is CASEL.

One story he told us was of school bullying.  Studies have shown that young bullies have a difficulty telling threatening facial expressions from non threatning so that anyone who is not engaging with and smiling at them is a threat an likely to be attacked. This is often from the learning at home where there may be a history of physical attacks from family members who have neutral expressions. The SEL program teaches these children to recognise peoples expressions with the resultant measured improvement.

Of particular interest was Golemans claim that SEL training has a hugely beneficial impact which become discernable at University entry level where those who had completed the training got on average much higher test results that those of equivalent background and class. Further he told us that the impact of the SEL training was so large that is was a bigger differentiator that any made by the aforementioned social background or race. It has also been shown that SEL learning provides students with basic skills such as good decision-making and refusal skills, which help them to avoid engaging in high-risk behaviors such as drug taking and to participate in behaviors that support their positive development.

So reversing the corollary back to the Organisation what can we expect from improving the Emotional Intelligence of your people. Better teamwork, leadership and results can be expected.The Emotionally Intelligent Organisation is an organisation with a high number of emotionally intelligent leaders, managers and high profile employees and generally stands to be at the forefront of organisational practice and performance. An Organisation that promotes openness and diversity, encourages honesty, transparency and spontaneity is also more innovative and responsive and quite importantly it is more likely to be an employer of choice.

Aidan Higgins

Real Emotional Intelligence

Someone asked me last week what exactly Emotional Intelligence was. I explained that its a combination of factors namely (Goleman) Self Awareness (to be aware of ones own emotional state, emotional reactions and focus of attention), Self Management (the ability to regulate those emotions and reactions), Motivation (the ability to rise to a challenge and maintain the energy required), Empathy (the ability to understand other peoples emotions and be present for/to them) and Social Skills ( the ability to interact with others and build social networks).  I explained that it was totally seperate from IQ in that it was not Intelligence in the normal sense that we have come to know over the years and that it seems that Emotional Intelligence is very important to success in life.

The response was “So?”. “Well” I continued - “people who are successful and particularly business managers are shown to have high Emotional Intelligence and the higher the Emotional Intelligence the more chance of being really good at your job and moving up the organisation.” The response was “So you’re telling me that people with better motivation and social skills basically make better managers”. “Yes” I said, happy my point had gotten across. “But” the reply came “That’s common sense. We all know that. Whats new about that?”

Oops - I was stumped for a sec - so I said ”Well now its proven to be true” and winced inwardly. I deserved the look I got from my inquisitor. So I stopped for a bit and I thought it out before saying - “I suppose its about the old rule, you can’t improve what you can’t measure, so the fact that the factors have been identified and are now measurable means you can tell what someones EQ level is and work on its improvement.” I explained the EQ was the Emotional Quotient that is the measure of one EQ (as IQ is for Intelligence).  For this I got a nod which said “Maybe this guy does know what he is talking about”….”Maybe!”.

But its an excellent question and one which brings into focus the question of competencies and their measurement. There are more definitions of Emotional Intelligence than Golemans. Two of the most respected are those of Higgs and Dulewicz and Mayer and Salovey (more on those anon), but the measurement instrument that is most popular is the Rueven Bar-on model which was named after its developer and provides an EQ-i score from a test based on 133 items. These questions are sectioned to address: Intrapersonal - comprising Self-Regard, Emotional Self-Awareness, Assertiveness, Independence and Self-Actualization; Interpersonal comprising Empathy, Social Responsibility and Interpersonal Relationship; Stress Management comprising Stress Tolerance and Impulse Control; Adaptability comprising Reality-Testing, Flexibility, and Problem-Solving; General Mood comprising Optimism and Happiness.

Given the EQ-i measure of Emotional Intelligence has been around for a while there have been a few interesting trends evolving - particularly where there is a suitable base for research - North America. One such trend is that Emotional Intelligence tends to improve as you get older. And peaks - on average - in ones late 40’s. A form of wisdom perhaps. Also interesting is that there is no difference between ethnic groups. Most fun of all however - definitely for the social dinner gathering this one - is the finding that females are more aware of emotions than males while the latter are more adept at managing emotions than the former. I don’t know about you but there are definitely a few times and places where I wouldn’t bring that up without wearing my motorcycle helmet.

Aidan Higgins